July 11th, 2015 (AKA: The Big Day)

So, my due date is tomorrow. And I'm anxious. I know I won't have him tomorrow, the chances of that are slim, but the anxiety in me is building knowing that it's supposed to be happening soon. It could be any day, the labor could end several different ways, and it's scaring me that I don't know the level of pain I will be experiencing.
Everyone tells me how wonderful the experience will be and how I will forget about all the pain once I'm holding my little Jack in my arms, and then go on to tell me how they were in labor for 36 hours and thought they were going to pass out. Yes, please continue to tell the person with anxiety and a strong fear of labor. Please continue to tell me how my body will never be the same, and I will never sleep again.
Yeah, definitely not scaring the shit out of me. Not at all..
If you want to help me out, give me little tips and tricks to make my labor easier, or the healing afterwards easier. But please don't just tell me how painful it will be and smile like this is something every pregnant person should be okay with. Because me, the girl who never planned on having kids, is not okay with pushing a baby out, or having it cut out of me.
Now, I am extremely happy that I am pregnant. I didn't plan this, and ever since I was a little girl I decided I didn't want a kid. My reasoning? Because I didn't want to push a baby out of me! I don't mind the thought of having a little adorable baby, or a rambunctious toddler, or a mouthy teen. I just can't stand the thought of being in labor. It makes me sick.

Instead of giving me those terrible, horrible, stomach sickening labor stories, please give me some tips that you wish someone told you. Something that I should definitely bring with me to the hospital, like gum. Or maybe a trick you learned to make your recovery easier for you and your loved one. (Lord knows I am going to be testing my mans patience.) Or tell me your labor story if it was the easiest thing you've ever had to do. Yeah, I could get down with some stories like that.